kate+speaks

I wholeheartedly think I am funny.

I make myself laugh all the time. I read my old blogs and old opinions and I laugh out loud.

Read this one: [Note, this was written when I used to work at Bath and Body Works]

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 07, 2004

today at work a man came in asking for “edible massage oil.” he asked without any hesitation and loud enough for me, who was all the way in the back of the store, to hear. my boss thought he was “special” as in exceptional, i just think he’s a perv. question of the week… how do you feel about people who buy economy-sized boxes of condoms?

I have just spent one hour looking through 80’s cartoons and show themes on YouTube. Please get at me if you can remember the following:

I’m a 80’s baby all the damn way…

WhHAAhAhahhahAHAHHAaaaaTTTttttt!?!??!?

While at dinner with the man I brought up the old Alice in Wonderland tv series that aired during the 90’s. I’m not sure if I’m the only one around that still remembers, but I think it used to play on Fox on Saturdays. Anyways, I loved it. I love Alice in Wonderland. I was never the Disney-princess-type as a girl growing up, but I love Alice in Wonderland.

So through the power of YouTube, I decided to do a search online and found something even better.

Maybe I just been out of the loop, maybe everyone else knows this and I just happened not to catch it… but…

Tim Burton is doing a version of Alice in Wonderland!!! Staring his two muses: Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter. It has a complete all star cast, but I’m just saying…. I’m freaking excited.

Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter

Every morning I get 10 or 15 emails regarding Facebook.

The world of Facebook is getting ridiculous. I knew it would go there when my friend count surpassed the count on Myspace. Cause according to Facebook, I have 200+ friends.

The Girl Crush

I am very proud to say that I do not have wandering eyes. Other men do not interest me one bit, I often overlook someone trying to flirt or holler (not that its often), and I have been told that I own a strong “Fuck Off” face once I step into a club. I met the man early in life, dated and then settled down. I won’t lie, he’s hot balls, and he’s mine. I’m on cloud 900 that I get to spend the rest of my life with him.

HOWEVERRR….

I check out my fellow females ALL. THE. TIME. Please note, this is completely on a non-sexual and heterosexual sense. I get one minute girl crushes quite often. Once I sat next to a girl on the bus and she was more petite than me and had fushia peek-a-boo highlights. Another time there was a girl walking her fixed gear bike. Sometimes its girls who dress so casually but paint their faces like artists cause they know how to apply make-up so well. I guess its style, appearance, and swag that attracts me (in a completely heterosexual way, remember).

Yes, girls can have swag, please believe. I notice.

New philosophy on life: “Coordinated–but not matching.”

You know you have willpower when…

You hit up your most favorite ice cream parlor [Mitchells], to get your most favorite ice cream flavor [Grasshopper Pie], and you only order the Jr. sized scoop which is basically NOTHING.

Willpower. Two factors: wedding dress + two piece swimsuit, July.

Random Conversation

K8: I need money. This economy sucks. I need money. LETS SELL DRUGS.
[Stranger passes by after we turn a corner.]
Jeff: Why’d you say that all loud? She hella heard you.

Siiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccckkk

Please remember that I am NOT a Weezy fan, by no means do I appreciate any of his songs (except for “Yes” with Pharrell, cause it bangs like helllll), but this guy’s covers are so ridiculously sick:

Confession:

When Jeff and I were seniors in high school (back circa 2001) he got nominated for senior ball king.

I did not vote for him.

I didn’t want to risk the chances of him winning with his freshly-cut-ex-gf. Thinking back, they didn’t really stand a chance against the rest [no offense, lover], but still, I had to do things right by me. Hahaha.

I thought about all this while washing dishes this afternoon.