kate+speaks

Last night I was one of those girls that I personally cannot stand. The girl who had too much to drink, girl who can’t stand on her own, the girl so pathetic she can’t even get out of her own clothes, or get herself to the toilet to yak.

Yes folks, for once… I was that girl.

I’ve always hated that girl. She’s a mess, she causes a scene, she attracts too much negative attention, trust me… I hated being that girl. Never again will I be that girl.

However… I guess thats how you go out with a bang? Man… I am SO READY to get married.

Note: I completely enjoyed myself, from what I can remember before getting into the cab at the end of the night, after that it was all about my body rejecting the massive amounts of liquor I previously consumed, rejection after rejection, after rejection.

I was SO FAR GONE. THANK YOU.

PMS is here.

Just realized after I wrote that last blog.

[lifts shot into the air and throws one back]

Somebody find me a stone to step on

Frankly I am pretty anxious about finding a full time job. Two years out of school and I haven’t found a single place that was a real “fit.” I guess they felt that way too… which is why I am nowhere.

My first internship was a nice and safe place to be, plenty of creative freedom, trust, encouragement, and compliments. Seems like no one has seen the true potential in me since then. Ehh, its not personal, its business… I understand.

But personally… it hurts. No lie.

“The recession sucks… the recession… the recession… the recession…”

Fuck the recession. I am talented enough to have and keep a job. There are PLENTY of lackluster designers out there holding down 9-5’s.

When do I finally get mine?

I am SO looking forward to this weekend.

Saturday, the best friend is graduating college. She is a mom & a wife and now a college grad, I’m so proud of her! Plus, I’m so ready to celebrate, she deserves it. Not to mention… my diet will finally be over by then and it just so happens that Sacramento is home to some awesome Mexican food. I am already dreaming about California burritos.

Sunday, is the official last celebration of my “singledom.” I haven’t had a girls night since I was probably 21 years old, my girls are not easily accessible, they are either on the other side of the country, the state, or mothers & wives with obligations to their families. So…. SUNDAY NIGHT IS THE NIGHT, dedicated to myself. I only wonder how the hell I will survive the whole night in a tight red dress and 3.5 inch heels. If you know me personally I like to get down in flannel shirts and flat boots, don’t get me wrong, I love to dress up… but I’m afraid my normal dance moves will have to be toned down for the night. I fear I will be one of those girls so desperate and drunk that she walks with heels in hand–barefooted, I cringe at the possibilities. Also, I’ve never had I had the chance to experience some real VIP bottle service. I am usually the type to drink in the car and buy one drink in a club. Classy right? So I will savor that $250 bottle of Grey Goose like it is GOLD.

Monday, is my most favorrrrrrite holiday of all time, Memorial Day. No joke. It is my favorite as I believe it is the true mark that summer has begun. Hopefully we can gather up some friends and bbq in the city. Plus… I can finally grab a beer by then.

Memorial Day weekend is no joke!

Things I want to eat or drink right now:

Chocolate Froyo
A croissant
Sourdough bread & butter
A cinnamon crumble donut
Chocolate
A Cinnabon Roll
One Auntie Anne’s Pretzel
Thai Iced Tea
Peach Smoothie
A banana
A yellow cupcake with chocolate buttercream
A churro
Pan de sal with peanut butter
A Porto’s Cheese Roll
A california burrito
Two dragon rolls
Cereal with milk
A scone with cream & jam
A blueberry muffin
A chocolate chip cookie
Fried sesame ball
Red bean mochi
Fried banana with coconut ice cream
A crepe with nutella & bananas
A belgian waffle
Pancakes
A snickerdoodle
Red velvet cake

Thats all I could think of at the moment…

72 guests booked and invitations haven’t even been sent. I think I’m the only one having a recession.

Am I late… on that Drake shit?

Ohmygahd I am i love.

Its definitely more than “a little bit.”

Detoxing from carbohydrates

I am on the South Beach Diet for the second time in my life. Its not even necessary, but I am obsessive about my weight. Plus, I’m getting married and I don’t feel bad at all wanting to look the best I’ve ever been on my wedding day. Yes, its vain, but while paying $2500 for a stellar photographer–you better look good in your photos, not to mention dress. I appreciate everyone who looks at me funny every-time I tell them I am on a “diet,” but honestly I need to come clean with my carb addiction. I need to cut ties, and this is one great way.

Personally I don’t think the SBD is much of a diet, granted, you REALLY have to watch what you eat: no carbs (at all) and no alcohol, if you don’t know how to navigate foods then it can be difficult. If you don’t plan your meals and snacks ahead of time, its difficult. If your fridge is not full of healthy things to grab, its difficult.

The first time I did the SBD I lost my college fat and addiction to really bad food, its true what they say, its not really a diet, its a lifestyle change. I eat whatever I want, to a point and at the appropriate times. Growing up I never thought I would be one of those girls who would order a salad for dinner, but eventually you figure it can taste good and be good for you, and that greasy burger is satisfactory for a minute and then you feel like shit. Ehh, I guess I really believe in this thing…

Four days down, ends on 5/24 just in time for my bachelorette party (tell me that doesn’t work out perfectly).

My philosophy as the wedding draws closer:

Fuggggggggit. I just want to get married already, have a hard drink in my hand and dance with my husband.